i won't cry anymore. whatever you say, it won't have any effect. but i do feel it. tebalkan muker katerkan. i know my attitude and behaivour are like shit and all. i know, to you i step cute. especially yesterday with the mouse i bought from 2/2. i know i feel outcast. i know i look like a witch with the big red pimple on my nose. i know other people also can't stand my attitude. and so what if i become quiet(?) fine, so what you act cold towards me.so what people take concern on why i become quiet. so what i want to help in CIP. so what i come sit with you like orang giler jemput diri sendiri. so many so what. but at least i could have the right to have friends and know the reason why you all feel irritated by me. i don't wish to cry, to fight, to whatever. but if any of you want to scream at me, go ahead. i know one of you do. so go ahead. say out all your fucking shit comments about me straight to my face. i know i can't fit in. i'll accept that. but i could at least have friends with others. you stare at people when they come to me and talk to me. yo murmured and mouthed out to others when you see people comfort me. you even mumbled something when i jemput diri sendiri to join you. this is all repeating again, huh(?) all the same routine again. i don't wish to be rude. but why me(?) of all people, you pin-pointed me. of all the fucking shit attitude, it had to be me though i was trying to change. everything had to be me. but you know what, i don't care. helping for a good cause, fine. wah. all take the same stream. and when you saw what stream i took, you gave me the impression like i gotta be kidding right. hey get this. NO(!) i have a heart to study. not to rule or judge people around. and don't judge a book by its cover and don't jump to conclusion. i know i'm not up-to-date about hot stuffs in school. hey, so be it. i don't wish to be trap in your stupid stories again. other people you can tolerate, not me. other people can act cute, not me[i never act cute, swear]. it's impossible you are jealous of me. because you got the beauty, the attitude, the personality the everything to be at the top. but you know what. that doesn't matter to me. i hate to have grudges on people. and if you intend to make me, then save for some other people. insult me, critise, whatever shit me, but i won't have grudges. i'll let whatever be, be alright. no use and no point i moan and cry and do stupid things over this. i got better things to do. and so do you. so don't just go around saying and whatever-ing around about people who doesn't do anything to you yet you made it as though they did. sorry to say all this.but i'm just saying in general. so don't twist and turn all my words. what i say here i mean it all. you yourself don't realise it and you say i don't realise it. i realise it, but i doubt you do. because you think you are always right. in general, i'm not referring to one person. so take it to consideration. gaah. sorry once again. i mean it when i'm sorry. but you say i don't. well, suit yourself. because i know i mean it when i'm sorry. it's your lost or win. it's up to you aite.